why am I like this
I've had lots of years between when I started this blogging journey and now. Years that have certainly mellowed me out. Years that gave me more grace and compassion for everyone and all the things. Years God spent teaching me lesson after lesson, crumbling my entire "how to do life" narrative, and honestly probably making me more palatable to people (or not- I'm an acquired taste 😆). The performing perfectionist, trying-to-be-in-control, hasn't worked hard enough to earn a break (and secretly judges everyone who takes a break for themselves out of sheer jealousy) was sent a swift kick to the derriere in the form of debilitating back pain. Honestly, I could laugh until I cry about how I have been sick to my stomach my entire life- spent decades just making sure that where ever I was going, there would be a working toilet in the very very near vicinity, and knowing I was going to puke and/or crap my brains out everywhere I went. And that level of illness still did
